Monday, June 2, 2014

With Loss Comes Gain

Well... Let me just say that it has been just a minute or two... or ten [lol] since I have written and to my "oh so many" followers, I apologize if you were waiting to read something new and I apologize making you wait a mere 11 months for a post. But, with that being said, I'll [hopefully] make it worth your while.

Since my last post at the end of July 2013, about how we were carryin' on that ol' family tradition at a place called "Cow Camp," so much has happened. Changed. Whatever you'd like to call it. Some good. Some bad. And some we just would worry about mentioning. Here we are rolling into August 2013.

August started at a tough point. We had lost the roommate due to the simple fact that we weren't comparable to live together. Buddies, yes. Roommates, not so much. So she moved out and live went on for the both of us. Burton, Chi Chi (Malia) and I went along just fine. I knew my lease at the condo was going to expire by the end of August but I figured "hey, well if I was doing ok without a roommate to live here the first time, I should be okay this time," even though I was looking at other options. Moving somewhere cheaper if I could or always had the option to move back in with the parentals and save money.

Let's be honest, shall we? I have been moved out of my parents house since a week after my high school graduation. In August of 2013, I was 25. There was no way in hell I wanted to move back home after being out for so long. Some call it immature. Some call it too much pride. Call it whatever you want, I just felt that since I've been doing it for so long, I didn't want to move back home.

Well, a whole DAY AND A HALF into August passes. Friday, August 2nd seemed like every normal Friday. I woke up, took my shower, had my coffee and took Chi Chi to school. I was on my way to what I thought was a glorious day at work. It was sunny, clear and tunes were cranked. I was chipper and in a great mood and seizing the day. Seizing the day mind you, I get to work and spent two "glorious" hours there.

At 10 AM I get an email from my boss- "Would you please come in here for a minute."

THERE'S some great news... I walk in and close the door to find my boss and our HR rep in there. My heart instantly drops. Needless to say, they let me go. "We're gonna let you go."

Here's the thing: I didn't want to be "let go." I was a single mother to what was about to turn 5 year old.

Like the good ol' girl I am, I told that "I understand" and thanked them for the amazing opportunity in working with them. It wasn't just about the money that I was now not going to have to pay rent, utilities, or other necessities for my child and I or the long road of job searching I had ahead of me. Point blank, I loved my job. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to give that up.

Now mind you, I just lost my roommate, right? Strike one. I just lost my job. Strike two. And crank and wind up pitcher, we all know there's a strike three call coming. I'm at bat trying to determine whether I'm gonna have strike three called or go out swinging. Now, for those of you who know me well, I always go down swingin. So my final pitch is whether I'm gonna tough out my last paycheck on rent for a couple months or if I'm gonna lose my house and move back in with the parentals and save my check.

Well. I went down swingin. Strike three on a swing and I walked off the plate like an all star who just lost Game 7 in the Series.

I gave up my condo. I started packing and started moving back back into the home I grew up in, the one I hadn't lived in since June 9th, 2006 and here it is, 7 years later and I'm comin home.

Now when you lose some, you typically gain some, right? Well at the same time I was losing my mind while my whole life was being turned upside down, I was beginning a new relationship with someone. He was completely amazing and we clicked quick. I knew him from high school but we since we were clicking and hanging out so much, he seemed to be the only thing at that time that was keeping me balanced. He was funny and always got me to smile and/or laugh when all I really wanted to do was just bawl. He helped me with my move and was so generous with finances but his emotional support was the best thing he ever gave me.

We dated and took care of Chi Chi together and did all the things you typically do when you're dating; movie night, family dinners, watch football.

Now here we are rolling into September, all moved into The House That Built Me and starting my job searching. At that same time, Chi Chi was starting something of her own. Kindergarten! She started school and made so many friends in her first week. One in particular, a sweet girl named Ava. Ava and her family lives right behind us and I had made fast friends with her mother, Sarah during a walk to school. Everyday, we would walk the girls to and from school and started having playdates! (More on this later).

Fast forward to when 'It's beginning to look alot like Christmas.'


Well to me, it didnt. The amazing guy I mentioned earlier, well he and myself had broken up. Now this one hurt- and it hurt bad. To be honest, it still does. So after a breakup and 21 days before Christmas, it was not looking like a holly jolly holiday at all. Hell, it was me singin "Blue Christmas" blues into my shot glass along with Elvis Presley. On top of that, it was the first Christmas my family and I would be spending withOUT my precious grandmother we had lost earlier in the year. (See blog June 14, 2013). I spent the most of December in a "slump" constantly asking "Where are you Christmas?" with Cindy Lou Who. I had to put on my "big girls don't cry" pants and put on my happy cheer for my little one. She kept me going, just like always. I was, am and always will be, thankful for that. We had a great Christmas and I was very fortunate to be with the ones who love me even though I was having the hardest time. As if that wasn't tough enough, I was STILL looking for work. Talk about a stress level increase. Yikes! I spent so many sleepless nights on my computer filling out applications and sending resumes. I felt like the concessions guy at the ballpark screaming "Peanuts! Get your peanuts!" but no matter how loud you yell it or how many times you repeat it, no one even looks. That's totally how I felt.


Then out of blue clear sky, the saints came marching right in for me. One out of the many sleepless nights fell through for me. I got a call a few hours after submitting my resume, asking me to come in for a interview. I went (of course) and then 15 minutes after I had left, I got a call for a second interview the next morning. Again, I went. I felt like things just might turn around. I tried not to get my hopes up just yet and didn't want to put all my eggs in the "I can be done job hunting" basket. I called 3 days later to see if there had been any decisions made in regards to my interview and the voice on the other end of the line informs me that they "decided to go with someone else but thank you for meeting with us."  I was crushed. I really wanted this one.


A day passed by and I checked my phone after doing the dishes. Well I see a missed call and a voice mail had been left by the company that I just spoke with the previous day saying they had chosen another candidate. I wondered, 'What's going on? Did they call me on accident?' It was no accident. The candidate they chose, backed out of the position and I had been the first alternate. *SCORE! I was offered the position to fill the front desk at an investment company. I have been here since March and I absolutely love it here. The people are amazing and the location is great, right off the max line!

All caught up to now, I have just been working, still living with the parentals and saving to get Chi Chi and I our own place in a few months. We have been living a lot better now, a lot less stress free since I started working again. We still have our daily struggles, but who doesn't. Bills are paid, food is in the tummies, and summer is in the air.

I promise to be better about blogging, and who knows, I just *may* post again later tonight- but only if you're lucky! :]

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